i am trying to adjust my perspective on
leaving
versus
going
to leave is different.
saying goodbye, and meaning it
with the intention
that there is nothing left to mention
amidst all that is left unsaid.
the end is no longer near
because the end is here.
but going is good!
going to a new city!
a new job, a new school, or a new cafe
going on a run
going to cut your hair
going on a road trip
we are born to go!
and to go is not the same as to leave.
i encourage my friends to go
but my heart hurts when they leave
but now i know that the two are not the same
they carry pieces of me with them wherever they go,
not abandon them in shards
as it is to leave.
they will sit on trains and flights and
yearn for the familiarity of our time together.
of my banana bread and big hugs
and i will think of our laughter (my favorite medicine)
on days where nostalgia tucks me in to bed
and deja vu softens my eyes
and it will bring us all comfort to remember.
for i know now, after all of this time
after every graduation and adaptation
and manifestation and appreciation
that the golden cords tied from my recollections to yours
are far more elastic than i ever could have imagined
